Friday, November 2, 2012

Myths Part 2


Myth: A woman's hymen seals her vagina, and is 'popped' and destroyed when she loses her virginity."

A woman's hymen is a membrane stretched over the opening. Sometimes, this membrane is solid, but most of the time it has at least one or more holes in it. Many things can cause the membrane to break, not just vaginal intercourse, including accidents (landing with something between her legs), horseback riding, gymnastics, martial arts lessons, and tampons. Sometimes, the hymen has one large hole in the center, and instead of breaking, the hole in the hymen simply widens. In many women, the hymen can grow back.

If a woman has one of the solid hymens, and does not have sex for many years after she starts her period, then there might be a build-up of blood there. But that is the only instance in which sex with a virgin is the fabled bloody mess. The breaking of the hymen can be a painful experience for the woman, so it's important that her first lover be gentle.

Myth: Large breasts are large because they are filled with milk, like a waterbed. 

Breasts are not hollow sacs, they are made of fat. Women do not have milk in their breasts unless they are lactating, and women with large breasts will not necessarily lactate any more than women with small breasts.

The only way for a woman who has finished developing physically to increase her breast size without getting pregnant is by getting fatter. However, her breast size will continue to change and develop well into her 20's regardless of how much fat she does or doesn't gain.

Myth: You can fit anything in to your anus right now, don't worry if it hurts - you can take it.

While the anus can be trained to stretch out after a period of time, it does take a while. Your sphincter can be ripped, torn, or have microabrasions if you force anything in to it. While it may only take a few days or a week or two to train your anus to be larger, if you try to make a woman force something too large in to her rectum, she could actually injure herself. (This is all also true for the vagina - but my understanding is the vagina is much more stretchy and durable, and can take 'upgrades' in size much better than the anus)

Myth: Once you have trained your anus/vagina to a certain size, it will remain that way forever.

Your sphincter is a ring of muscles around the anus whose only purpose is to be tight. When you run a mile in 6 minutes in high school, does that mean you will be able to run a 6 minute mile forever even if you stop exercising for 5 years? The anus and vagina have a natural state they will return to after a period of time, as long as you aren't shoving huge objects up there every day.

Myth: You can fit that entire toy in your mouth, just shove it down your throat.

All women have an esophagus. The esophagus is a damn important part of the body. It can be bruised. Small, slender toys can sometimes be pushed in to an esophagus. But remember- anything bigger around than a quarter probably won't fit. Just because there is a slender pipe in the throat does not mean it is safe to cram giant objects down there.

Myth: You can easily direct a woman to orgasm by ______ 

All women orgasm differently. Most models have had men direct them to do things that were either A) not pleasing to her at all, or B) literally not simulating her sexual organs, and then after 3 minutes tell her to orgasm. Often, members will direct a woman to put a vibrator on her clitorous or play with her clit and then start telling her to orgasm. Some women can leave a vibrator on their clitorous for an hour and never climax.

If you want to see a woman have an orgasm, tell her "Do whatever you need to cum." If you want to see her do something specific, that is okay too. After all, we are here to give you a good show. But don't believe that it is going to make her orgasm just because it worked for someone else.

Myth: Women who say they started masturbating or having sex after they were 18 are just shy or embarrassed that they started at a younger age. Most or all women start having sexual experiences at a young age.

Every woman is different. Most start having sexual fantasies around puberty. They may masturbate when they are young children without it being sexual at all. They may not start masturbating until after they have sex.

Personally, I started having sexual fantasies at 11, and I lost my virginity a month before my 20th birthday. That summer was when I started masturbating, but only on camera with my fuck buddy. I didn't start masturbating to please myself until I was 22. When people ask me on camera, I usually just say "22".

Myth:
-You're so skinny, you must work out and watch what you eat!
-You don't need to work out, you look beautiful!

Some women are naturally skinny. No matter how much they eat, they will never gain weight. They do nothing to maintain it. Some women constantly work out and watch what they eat to maintain their current body-shape. Yes, working out and eating right are tools to keep a body healthy and in shape. But what shape is right for that body differs from woman to woman.

If a woman shares what she does to keep in shape with you, don't diss it. This is her choice, because she's the one who has to live with this body, and she's the one who has to feel the physical sensations generated by keeping in shape, or not keeping in shape. If she doesn't share it, don't make assumptions. You cannot tell how much a woman works out by what her body looks like. You cannot know if her body is the way it is because she works at it, or if it is the way it is without her doing anything, unless she decides to share that information with you.

MythA woman's nipples get hard when she is aroused.

Some women's nipples get hard when the woman is aroused. Most women's nipples get hard when it's cold, and stay soft when it's hot, unless they are played with. Some women's nipples don't get hard, no matter how aroused that woman is, or how cold it is outside. Every woman is different.

(Mine are naturally hard when it's cold, naturally soft when it's hot. If I'm aroused and I play with my nipples, they get hard quickly. If it's hot and I'm aroused, my nipples will get hard when played with eventually, but they won't stay that way for long. When the temperature is just right, my nipples' hardness corresponds to how sensitive my skin currently is, regardless of how aroused I am.)

Myth: The size of the breast corresponds to the sensitivity of the breast.

The truth is some women with large breasts have very sensitive breasts. Some women with large breasts have practically numb breasts. Some women with small breasts have very sensitive breasts. Some women with small breasts have practically numb breasts.

Personally, my breasts are hyper-sensitive for about a week out of the month. For a second week, they are pretty damn numb, and the last two weeks they are sensitive, but not too bad. (Mine are B-cup, but since I'm short they appear to be C-cup)

MythWomen start lactating as soon as they are pregnant.

Most women start lactating in the third trimester (that's months 7-9). Some women start a little sooner, some women don't start until the baby starts sucking on their breast (these women have to bottle feed for the first couple days until their breasts can provide milk). Some women lactate when they aren't even pregnant.

MythBreastfeeding is fun

When a woman gives birth, her breasts have recently been expanded far beyond their normal size. They've been rubbing against her clothing. I want you to imagine that something has been rubbing your dick for a week, non-stop, making it hyper-sensitive and slightly burned from friction. Now imagine someone sucking on it. Not fun, is it?

Now, I've never had a kid, so I can't say for sure that this is the type of pain mothers experience when they are breastfeeding, but I imagine it's pretty close.

Myth: If you don't learn to orgasm before a certain age you never will be able to and you have to be trained to orgasm

Some women's bodies don't become sensistive until a later date. Women will not be able to orgasm until their body becomes sensitive. Also, a woman can prevent herself from orgasming by believing it's not possible. If a woman is having trouble orgasming, the best thing she can do is experiment often with different sensations. Eventually, she will find one that causes orgasm. Usually, once she finds the one, something similar but slightly different will cause an orgasm, and so on and so on until she can orgasm any way that's possible for her body.

Notice I said that's possible for her body. Some women, it takes clit stimulation. Some women, it takes penetration. Me, it takes whatever my body's in the mood for. Luckily, fantasies always work to make me orgasm, so I am capable of orgasming during any private in which the gentleman has shown any amount of empathy. Alas, no matter how good the fantasy is, guys who don't show me empathy will not see a real orgasm.

MythIf the woman isn't screaming with pleasure, she's not enjoying it.

Some women make a lot of noise. some women are quiet. I'm generally quiet alone, because it makes for a more intense orgasm. I tend to make some noise in a show, unless it's a guy who has asked me to cum instead of just assuming that I will.

This means I have not-quite-as-intense orgasms for most men, but they are still genuine and they are still good.Personally, I'm happy with the show if the man has cum from it, or at least enjoyed it.

Myth
_____ will ruin a pussy.
A pussy that is used too much will become loose/desensitized.

The pussy is very elastic, and the human body is capable of healing itself. What this means, is that if a girl is fucking herself with a giant dildo all the time, she will be loose. But, if she stops fucking herself with the giant dildo for a couple weeks, she will tighten back up. If a girl uses incredibly strong vibrators all the time, her pussy MIGHT desensitize. But, when she stops using them for a day or two, her pussy will become sensitive again.

This also means that if a girl was loose before but you haven't had sex in a few days, she might be tighter now, so you'll have to loosen her up again.

Myth: When a girl is sucking and gags, it's a different gag from the one that makes you throw up.

Girls have one mouth, one throat, and one esophagus. Just like guys do. That gag that happens when you push your dick too far down her throat is exactly the same as the gag that happens just before she pukes. If you keep going when she's gagging, you will get vomit on your dick.

Myth: If you've seen how a woman orgasms once, that's how she always orgasms, and anything else is fake.

The truth is, every time I orgasm it's a little different. Sometimes, my entire body tenses. Sometimes, it spasms. Sometimes, I might leak a little ejaculate (never seen on camera), usually I don't get any wetter. Sometimes sounds are torn from my throat, sometimes I just want to make them. Usually, I stop breathing.

Girls who squirt don't necessarily do so every time they orgasm. For many of them, the squirting isn't linked to the orgasm at all. For all of them, there's a certain spot that must be stimulated to make them squirt, and for some of them, the way to stimulate that spot is not very pleasurable.

Myth: Going "deeper, faster, harder, rougher" equals more pleasure or better sex.

This is going to differ from woman to woman and for several reasons. If the guy's dick is much longer than her pussy, deeper might cause her pain. If the guy's dick is very tight in her pussy, harder and rougher is going to be very painful if it's done too soon. Anatomy, mood, time of month, level of arousal, personal preference, and level of trust between the partners are just some of the things that factor into whether a woman is going to like it deeper, faster, harder, rougher.

Personally, I need to start out gentle, because my pussy gets really tight sometimes. Starting off trying to shove stuff in often results in nothing happening.

MythForeplay is a long drawn out process invovling lots of touching.

This is the truth for some women. But every woman is different. When I say "foreplay" for the "sex without foreplay hurts", what I mean is "whatever makes the woman's mind and body ready for sex". For some women, this means ignoring their sexual needs for a few days so they beg for it. For some women, it means lots of touching. For some women, they need to hear how sexy they are to you. For some women, they just need to see that you are naked and hard.

This is why you need to be good at communicating, or at least good at noticing. You need to find out what turns the woman's mind on, and what gets her body ready. Here's the trick- those might actually be two different things.

My body will get turned on just from not having had any sexual contact in awhile. But my mind only gets turned on when I know the guy wants sex, and sometimes only when I know he wants sex with me, not just wanting sex from anybody.

If we did just have sex within the past couple days, then my body needs a bit of sensual touching before it will be turned on. This has the added benefit of telling my mind that he wants sex with me, so my mind does get turned on too.

Myth: Webcam models ask what you want just to be difficult.

You know how I've been saying over and over again that every woman is different, and every woman has different preferences? That applies to men too! For some men, seeing a woman in tight jeans is the sexiest thing ever. Other men want lingerie, and others prefer full nudity. For some men, the jiggling boobs is the best part, for others, the bouncing ass, or the accommodating pussy. Some men want me to humiliate them. Some men want me to laugh at them, and tell them I would never touch them in a million years. Some men want me to pamper them, butter them up, tell them how strong and sexy they are.

Some men want the porn experience, some men want the woman to enjoy it. Some men want the woman to worship him, some men want to worship the woman. Some men want the woman to take all his money without giving anything in return. Some men want the miracle of porn-anal where no shit is ever in evidence. Some men love seeing the dirty ending. Some men like a lot of dirty talk, some men prefer silence so he can hear her natural sex noises. Some men want an older woman who will take charge for them, some men want a younger woman who will look up to him. Some men want an airhead, and some men want the woman to be intelligent.

We cannot read your mind. We cannot know what you like. PLUS, we can't know that what you wanted last time is the same as what you want this time. So we need you to tell us what  you're looking for. Some models are not going to be comfortable doing what you're looking for, so it's best to ask before you start the private session if she's willing to do it.

Pro-tip: Webcam models generally know what makes them cum.

Cam models spend a damn long time doing sexy body exploration. You may know a thing or two about physiology in general but you don't know better than us about our own bodies! And please also keep in mind that if a model is feeling uncomfortable, she may say "oh I'm too tight for that" or something similar to get out of it. When a model clearly doesn't want to do something, don't call her out on it. That is an extremely uncomfortable situation to be put in to.

Remember- Porn is exaggerated to help you actually feel what you're seeing. It has very little in common with real life. Camgirls are not porn. Yes, you can interact and tell us what to do, but most of us are not really actors when it comes to the sex. Those of us who have been around for awhile know how to make things look good, but things that look good might not feel good. So, if you want a show that looks good, tell that to the model. If you want to see what really turns her on, tell that to the model. Most of all, if you don't like something about the model, move on to the next one.